There is a lie that acts like a virus within the mind of humanity. And that lie is, ‘There’s not enough good to go around. There’s lack and there’s limitation and there’s just not enough.’ ☥ The truth is that there’s more than enough good to go around. There is more than enough creative ideas. There is more than enough power. There is more than enough love. There’s more than enough joy. All of this begins to come through a mind that is aware of its own infinite nature. ☥ There is enough for everyone. If you believe it, if you can see it, if you act from it, it will show up for you. That's the truth. ☥ ☥ Dr. Michael Bernard Beckwith ☥
Our most recent pandemic has heightened our level of fear, but the hidden gift in our current state of affairs is an increased awareness around and need for improving and balancing our mental health. However, the stigma surrounding seeking a therapist still exists. The stigma is further complicated by faith-based, Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant Communities who struggle to cultivate trust in mental health professionals to have the cultural competence necessary to address the trauma, stress and impact of systemic racism.
It is important to remember that healing is a journey requiring patience, persistence and high standards regardless of whether we are healing our mind, body or emotions. Like all health practitioners, mental health counselors work for you, not the other way around.
Because our society stigmatizes mental health, we feel especially vulnerable when seeking a counselor. This vulnerability may cloud our judgement and cause us to forget that ALL health practitioners need to be properly vetted before we agree to work with them and we can fire them and find another practitioner at any time.
Seek to interview a mental health professional in the same way that we interview someone for a job, and research their background which can easily be found on many health providers' websites. Psychology Today offers another good way to research the background of therapists in a given area. I highly recommend looking for a mental health therapist who has a strong background in solutions-based and cognitive behavioral therapies.
The Association of Black Psychologists is an example of a good place to start for Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant People (BIIP) seeking culturally competent care. Regardless of our cultural background, I would not recommend working with a therapist who does not also seek counseling for themselves and actively engage in ongoing professional development. It is important that we look for a mental health practitioner who balances a personal connection with maintaining professional boundaries. Here are a few questions to ask ourselves when seeking a therapist:
☥ What are my end goals? (heart's desire, security in feelings, overcoming trauma,
setting healthy boundaries, etc.)
☥ What are my primary stressors?
☥ What do I hope to gain from counseling?
During the first meeting or consultation it is important to interview the therapist and ask probing questions such as:
☥ How do you set up counseling goals?
☥ What are your sessions like?
☥ What kind of self-work do you assign to help me continually improve?
After the first session, we can check in with ourselves to see how we truly feel:
☥ Did we feel safe (emotionally, physically)?
☥ Was the therapist present and engaged?
☥ Did they seem trustworthy?
Regardless of how difficult our challenges may seem, every problem has within it the seed of the solution. We can cultivate self-care while staying committed to the development of our mental health support system. My next blog will offer suggestions for creating a mental health self-care toolkit.
Drop the idea of becoming someone, because you are already a masterpiece. You cannot be improved. You have only to come to it, to know it, to realize it. ☥ ☥ ॐ Osho ☥
Mental Health Resources
The shareable links and videos below offer a wide array of resources through breathing, movement, lifestyle habits and counseling to assist you in your mental health self-care toolkit journey:
☥ How To Care For Your Nervous System While Sheltering in Place (interview with
Dr. Marshea Evans)
☥ Don't Fight Your Mirror, Clean It From Inside (Dr. Michael Beckwith)
☥ Let's Talk About Black Men And Therapy: Part I: There's Always A Story Behind
The Glory
☥ Let's Talk About Black Men And Therapy: Part II: Out Of Pain Come Purpose
Be well and be radiant ☥ Take the time ☥ Find the right fit.
Epilogue ☥ Your Treasure Map For Self-Care
Thank you for taking the time to actively engage in your own self-care. If you have ever spent time at a hammam ☥ steam room ☥ sauna, you will notice that it is a comfortable space because you are wearing minimal or no clothing and you can just be yourself. However, after a short time, it starts to get hot, and you begin to sweat. This is a good thing because you are helping your body to eliminate toxins. If you want to detoxify your body correctly you will:
☥ Breathe slowly and deeply to help your body adjust to the intensity of the heat.
☥ Sip water every 15 minutes to stay hydrated.
☥ Have a piece of fruit ☥ pumpkin seeds ☥ favorite healthy snack available.
☥ Take a shower after excessive sweating.
☥ Go into a cold room/take a cold plunge/cold water rinse off to cool down before doing
another sweat and to stimulate your lymphatic system.
☥ Go for a walk in nature, spend time in meditation ☥ contemplation, have a healthy meal
and give your body some time to complete the healing process (which could include
sending you messages through your intuition about your next steps).
As you journey through ☥ interact with the blogs ☥ other content on phyllishubbard.com, you might have an insight that causes you to suddenly feel mentally ☥ emotionally “hot” -- which could show up as:
☥ “Ah-ha” moments
☥ A hop-in-the-bed-and-cry-yourself-to-sleep or fetal position crying time of intensive
self-care
☥ Intense feelings of anger/regret about something in your past
☥ Disorientation caused by the realization of truth
☥ Strong reactions such as heightened senses, vomiting; an urge to release emotions
such as yelling/screaming, going outside for fresh air/to take a walk, punching a
boxing bag/pillow; a feeling of tightness in the chest, etc.
If you find yourself having a strong reaction, I encourage you to flow with it while helping your body to release mental ☥ emotional toxins by using the same five self-care strategies listed above for releasing physical toxins. Your body talks to you all the time, but unconscious adherence to social conditioning can mute its messages.
Strong reactions are your body’s way of letting you know that there is a deeper issue requiring your attention.
Keep revisiting the content ☥ utilizing the five self-care strategies until you no longer experience the strong reaction, release fears and have identified ☥ transformed ☥ removed the root cause of the issue. You will find additional strategies throughout this website that you can add to your mental health self-care toolkit.
Self-Care Sustainability Suggestions
☥ A Cross-Cultural Healing Haven – read this blog to understand the purpose of
phyllishubbard.com and the meaning behind its organization ☥ symbols.
☥ Revisit the content periodically and make a note of if/how your perceptions have
evolved. Check out our blog page for an experiential healing journey.
☥ Check out the other pages on phyllishubbard.com:
☥ Home - watch the videos. Click on the images in the Spiritual Guidance
section. Each image has a story that might assist your self-care journey. Learn
about other spiritual practices.
☥ About - Learn about my background ☥ reasons for co-creating
phyllishubbard.com
with Spirit. Explore healing through the image carousel and videos.
☥ Shop ☥ Kamitology - Purchase and download vital tools for your personal growth
☥ development.
☥ Reclaiming Our Humanity - Help us develop and disseminate video courses.
☥ Rise TV - Practice breathing and movement exercises and deepen your
understanding of healing through the experiences of community members.
Check back periodically to discover new/re-experience the content.
☥ Journey - This is your invitation to own the journey to radiance. Experience the
journey and download healing resources to share with your friends, family and
community.
When you share healing, healing comes back to and flows through you.
About Sharing ...
During my first presentation to an all-Black audience, I introduced 20-year-old research on the hazards of sitting. I presented the research because I noticed that people sat for way too long at convenings and realized that the information was not disseminated to Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant communities. I was determined to intentionally include this research, often surprising participants by getting people up to stretch. After more than 13 years of intentional work, Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant People are just barely beginning to normalize conscious movement. We still have a long way to go, and it is important that we share what we know as much as we can to prevent the disenfranchisement of wellness information to Black ☥ Indigenous ☥ Immigrant communities.
Please do not keep phyllishubbard.com to yourself. We will not co-create a better world until we heal our current, past/childhood traumas. We will not love others until we learn to love ourselves.
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